Lobster Club at Christopher’s Martini Bar, Covent Garden

22 Jul

LOCATION: Christopher’s Martini Bar, 18 Wellington Street, WC2E 7DD [map].

PRICE: £22.

BREAD: Brioche.

FILLING: Lobster, bacon (according to the menu), fried egg, iceberg lettuce, tomato.

PROS: The brioche is nice. It can’t not be, really, containing as it does all that lovely butter.

CONS: It’s not even really worth my ranting about the fact that the tomato is insipid, the fried egg completely overwhelms the lobster, the advertised bacon is entirely absent, and the chilli mayo is like something that turns up with your chips at GBK. It’s not really worth my even beginning to be upset about all those things because there is one monumental piss take happening here and that is the fact that each triangle, each quarter of the sandwich, contained 1 tiny piece of lobster; I’d say 4 pieces barely the size of a postage stamp and I mean the small ones, no special edition stamp sized pieces of lobster here. The sandwich is £22. TWENTY TWO POUNDS. Someone must be laughing all the way to the bank while relishing the fact they’re dressing all the customers up like total mugs. It’s frankly outrageous money for what is essentially a fried egg and salad sandwich with posh bread.

What makes this even more wincingly, acutely painful, is the fact that the lobster has been shonkily prepped; my mate gets a nice long piece of claw cartilage with his bit. Bigger than the piece of lobster meat it comes with. It’s not a one off either, as we can see from this review in The Independent. The kitchen consistently can’t be arsed.

And finally, just in case I haven’t discouraged you enough from ever ordering this sandwich, let’s consider that for two pounds LESS, you could eat a WHOLE LOBSTER, perfectly cooked, served with melted butter, chips AND a salad at Burger and Lobster on Dean Street.

They make a much better martini too.

SCORE: 1/10

12 Responses to “Lobster Club at Christopher’s Martini Bar, Covent Garden”

  1. Deepa (@lazygiraffe) July 22, 2013 at 9:03 am #

    I think it says a lot that they feel lobster should be improved upon with bacon and an egg. Most things are better with bacon but I would argue lobster isn’t. Not that it had bacon anyway. You know what I mean. How crappy.

  2. Blonde July 22, 2013 at 11:44 am #

    Wow. That’s just insulting, quite frankly. One to avoid, at all costs, clearly.

  3. Maria July 22, 2013 at 2:57 pm #

    Now that looks amazing!

  4. Jess July 23, 2013 at 9:10 am #

    Wow, what a crappy sandwich! Before I even read the review I was thinking about the (2 quid cheaper) delicious whole lobster, or very indulgent lobster brioche roll, from Burger and Lobster. Sounds like this place is best avoided by all.

    • londonreviewofsandwiches July 23, 2013 at 9:38 am #

      Absolutely. An insult to sandwiches. An insult to the customer. An insult to the tastebuds.

  5. donald July 23, 2013 at 2:03 pm #

    Do you think they were coming at it from the other angle. Lets take a club and make it luxurious by putting in a little bit of lobster? Doesn’t really justify it’s shitness though.
    Either way I now want to go to Burger and Lobster. We do that?

  6. Frank H-S July 24, 2013 at 1:37 pm #

    I’m glad you are back to not pulling any punches 😉 I do agree looks wise it is quite appetising. But obviously a mega-rip off.

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